Life is a…..

While there are many decisions I regret making in middle school (getting fringe bangs are at the top of the list), there is one particular choice that I made that reigns supreme. That decision being…starting a Facebook page. I was 12 years old and I was completely enamored by the idea of Facebook, I could feel “cool” and social by simply scrolling through pictures and statuses on my computer (which was a desktop by the way….do those even still exist?). For some reason, I also thought it was socially acceptable and “cool” to upload albums (yes, albums) of webcam photos of myself and update my 35 friends on how I was bored (Actual Status: Ughhhhh…..I’m bored ), or how much I related to the lyrics of that one song Airplanes (Actual Status: Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, cause I could really use a wish right now wish right now….really feelin this song xxx). No joke, the first few months of my Facebook career consisted of me updating my status about 20 times a day and also “liking” every page that I remotely related too. My page liking habit started off standard, I stuck mostly to acknowledging my love for soccer (Actual Like: Christiano Ronaldo) , candy (Actual Like: Sour patch kids),  and teen dramas (Actual Like: One Tree Hill). However, the more time I spent obsessing over Facebook and the idea of portraying myself in a certain way through a computer screen, I began liking more interesting pages; I made it clear I was Anti-drugs (Actual Likes: I Don’t smoke!, Hugs not Drugs), I made it clear I was a child and still experienced a thing called summer (Actual Like: The feeling when you wake up on the first day of summer), and I made it REALLY clear that I wanted psychic powers (Actual Like: I WISH I COULD READ MINDS). While I swiped my Facebook clean of anything too incriminating and scowl worthy, some of my early likes, statues, and photos still linger for my own entertainment.

The only good thing to come out of my early Facebook usage was my avid interest in a particular page/group called FML (*rude f-word* my life, such a wholesome page for a 12-year-old to be following), it’s a page I still enjoy following and is a place where people can lament about the general crapiness of their lives. I feel I’ve grown so attached to this page and these stories because I am comforted by the fact that crappy things don’t just happen to me (Actual Status: Lost $10 in the locker room…my life suxxx )’:  ). The funny thing is back when I started following FML, I didn’t even have an idea of what an actually crappy situation was (No Maya, losing the $10 that you stole from your dad’s wallet is not the worst thing that’ll ever happen to you). No, an actual crappy situation is what happened to me today (ah, yes I’m finally cutting to the chase of this post 😉).

Saturdays are typically my DAY, I can sleep late, be without crying toddlers, and spend five hours straight watching true crime documentaries. However, for the past month or so, almost every Saturday has been dedicated to taking tests for my online math class. While this doesn’t seem like it would mess up my Saturday plans too terribly much, it does! I’m taking the class through a junior college and it’s one of those courses that I just have to survive through, overall the class is pretty simple all I have to do is homework questions and take the tests. The biggest issue I have is that the testing center I’m required to take the exams at is in another city that is a little over an hour away from where I live. So, every Saturday for the past month I have driven an hour each way to take an exam (I feel I should earn bonus points solely for the drive). One weekend, I got the hours of the center confused and arrived just two minutes before they stopped administering exams (I definitely escaped an FML moment there). This weekend I wasn’t so lucky, after a long Friday night of studying (Actual Status: Bored on a Friday, who wants to hang?),  I woke up early and drove the hour to get the test done.  When I got to the testing center I followed the normal procedures and approached one of the women who worked there in order to get the password for my exam. Let me also add that the women who work in that testing center must be active contributors to the FML page, cause they are ALWAYS in a less than happy mood. I gave the woman my ID and all the information I needed to take my exam, she quickly scanned it and typed furiously on her computer. After a minute, I started to get the feeling that something was wrong because it was taking much longer than it usually did, but I waited patiently and watched as she typed, furrowed her brow, typed, made a stink face, typed. Finally, after five minutes of funny faces and furious typing she turned to me and said

Woman: “We don’t have the test your wanting to take, you’ll have to get in touch with your professor and see why we don’t have it”

Maya: (VERY PATIENTLY) “You should have it, all the tests were made available on the first day of class which was two months ago…..I come here almost every Saturday to take an exam and I’ve never once had a problem,”

Woman: “Sorry, it’s out of my hands. There is a line forming, I’m going to need you to go.”

Maya: (MUCH LESS PATIENTLY): “I don’t understand why it wouldn’t be there, I can write out the information to make sure there isn’t a spelling mistake or anything. I drove over an hour to take this exam, so I really would hate to leave here without taking it”

Woman: (with stink face & furrowed brows) “I’m sorry but we can’t help you, now if you could please move along there are other people who need to be helped.”

Maya: (in her head, even though she thought about saying it aloud) “Sucks for them because you don’t seem to be helping people with their problems..”

And that folks, is a real FML moment (Actual Status: Had to run laps in athletics today, fml :/). I left the testing center without having taken a test and having an hour-long rage filled drive ahead of me. I spent the whole drive on the phone with my parents talking through how aggressive my email to my professor should be (it ended up being a good mix of aggression, outrage, and please pity me). Sadly it’s the weekend so my professor won’t even attempt to respond to my email or help with the problem till Monday or Tuesday. In the end, my professor is probably going to confirm that the testing center screwed up and offer me no kind of compensation for my wasted trip. All I have instead is a confirmation that my life enjoys complicating itself…..maybe it’s karma for being so entertained by other people’s FML moments.

P.S: I don’t typically elaborate on the songs I link in my posts because they typically speak for themselves. This however is my current “bad mood” jam…it celebrates my sorrow and makes me feel better at the same time! Also the artist is my ideal future husband; outlandishly tall, musically gifted, and a sensitive soul. So, if you know him or anyone older than 20 like him….don’t hesitate to hit me up! 😉

Catch you on the flipside!

Maya

Well, That was Awkward….

Let me tell you I’m no stranger to awkward moments, I still have vivid memories of the time I left my bra in my 9th grade algebra class. Yes, you read that right….I left my BRA in algebra class. In high school I played soccer, and the freshman soccer players were given the ultimate blessing of having practice during the second to last class period of the day (SECOND to last….as in we had one last class to go to after practice, as if being a freshman wasn’t already torture enough…). On one particular day, our coach decided to really torture us and only gave us three minutes to change before our next class, I’ll also add that my algebra class was on the complete opposite side of the building, (maybe like a mile walk….or a ½ mile….okay maybe it was more like an 1/8 but either way it was awful!) so I had no time to attempt to go back to class looking decent, which I made my best efforts to do on most days because the boy I was infatuated with was also in that class (Spoiler alert: It never worked out between us, to this day  I still blame my soccer coach for sending me to last period smelly every day). Because my time was limited and my Algebra teacher was a stickler for punctuality, I decided against changing out of my practice clothes and instead sprayed myself with a whole bottle of Japanese Cherry Blossom body spray (because it mixes so well with sweat…) and carried my bundle of clothing in my hands instead of shoving them into my gym bag. I made a run for it and I ended up making it to class right on time, once I got into my chair I shoved my clothes into my bag and got out my pencils and notebook and did a quick smell check on myself while no one was looking. What I didn’t notice until it was too late was that right in the front of the room, dead center, was the bra I had worn that day. There it was just sitting there in all of its 32AA glory (I was a bit of a late bloomer), I instantly panicked thinking about who could have seen me drop it…should I try to be smooth and walk over to pick it up or should I try to be sneaky and drag it with my foot back to my desk (because no one would ever notice that 😉). I was so caught up thinking about what I was going to do that I didn’t even see my teacher stride over and gingerly pick it up by the tag with two fingers and say

“Ladies, is anyone missing something?”

Eyes danced around the room looking for someone to claim it, when one boy raised his hand saying it was definitely his ( why I even wasted my time on boys in 9th grade is beyond me). I was waiting for someone to shout out that it was mine and they saw me drop it, but it never happened. So instead, my cute little baby bra stayed in Mr. A’s lost and found bucket until the last day of class when a strange turn of events occurred. My friend and I were just about to leave the room for the last time when he called for me to stay a minute, keep in mind the bra incident happened months before the last day of class….and I myself had buried the memory of leaving it below sea level, so the two of us stayed back and he waited for everyone to exit the room. When it was just the three of us left, he looked me dead in the eye and said

“You may want to get your…. possession from the lost and found bucket now”

My mind immediately took me back to that horrific day, and without making eye contact I walked over and swiftly grabbed my long-lost bra and quickly exited the room, also pushing my friend out with me, without saying a word. Once we were a safe 10 miles away from the room and my cheeks finally stopped burning red, I asked my friend how he could have ever known it was mine (yes, looking back now the whole situation was not only awkward but also borderline creepy). We spent a good amount of time coming up with different scenarios of how Mr. A could have figured out who owned the bra—when I remembered who my mother was…. I pulled the bra out and saw plain as day written on the tag in black sharpie M. Leiva. And I thought all along that I had saved myself from an awkward situation, at least he had the decency to wait until there was no one around to reveal that he knew it was my “possession” the whole time. To be honest though, I was happy to have my bra back it was my favorite one!

Luckily, I am now at the point in my life where I can just laugh off awkward situations like that; just last week my roommate’s brother came over to our house to drop some things off and I just so happened to NOT be wearing pants (I was alone at the house, so I felt I should take advantage and go pant less for a bit). I was at least wearing an over sized t-shirt (basically a muumuu) and the house was dark, but still the experience itself was a tad bit awkward. In the end, I’ve gotten used to dealing with the awkwardness because that’s my life and it’s probably (I mean ALWAYS) going to be like this.

Catch you on the flipside!

Maya

We are who we are

I had an interesting conversation with my coworker the other day (well, we have interesting/slightly inappropriate/hilarious conversations on a regular…love you Jess!), but this one stuck out to me the most because it really had me thinking about human nature. We were talking about how it’s funny that we can tell how our babies (babies meaning the babies we take care of at the daycare we work at, they aren’t actually our children…thankfully😉) are going to be when they grow up. At just 18 months old those children have the most distinct personalities, which is crazy because their vocabulary and motor skills are equivalent to that of a really tipsy fraternity brothers’ AND they still poop their pants! Regardless of that, out of our group of toddlers we have picked out which child is going to take over wall street, which child is going to be a cowboy (there are a few contenders for that one, we do work at a preschool in central Texas), and which child is going to be the wild one who sneaks out of their parents’ house on a school night (okay, maybe we decided that they were all probably going to do that…). In the end, this fun little future superlatives game really had me thinking…….we truly don’t change that much from birth to adulthood. Let me clarify that statement—we don’t change that much on the inside from birth to adulthood, we definitely change physically (thank goodness, I don’t look the same as I did in middle school) but our personalities and natural dispositions are always pretty much the same. Following this riveting work conversation (I’m totally making it sound like all we do at work is talk, which is completely false….we talk WHILE we work 😊), I talked more about this great realization I had with my mom. She agreed with my conjecture saying my sister and I haven’t changed a bit since birth; stating Gabby, my sister, was an “angel baby”, who could sleep through anything and loved going to the mall to shop even at the age of 2. I on the other hand was what she called “a bit of a challenge”—I spent the first three years of my life fighting any kind of sleep and hating being confined to cribs, car seats, and strollers (I don’t know what she was talking about…I sound like the dream child). The funny things is, my sister and I are still the same way; the moment she sits down on a soft surface she’s out like a light and she could spend DAYS in the same store shopping. I on the other hand still fight sleep on a daily basis (I’m definitely an insomniac) and I hate being confined inside of things (the Dixie Chicks had it right when they sang about wide open spaces…. they’re the best). In the end, knowing that I’ve always been a bit of a hot-tempered odd ball makes me more comfortable embracing the fact that I’ll never change….even though I tried real hard to in my adolescent years.

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Good to know I was born with that RBF! 😉

I know I’ve been writing a lot about myself, and reflecting on my past decisions and experiences (not always the most entertaining material, but it’s at least enlightening, right?) but the topic has really been at the forefront of my thoughts lately. Maybe it’s because I’m getting older, (I’ll be 20-“fun” in less than a month) and I’m about to graduate and actually have adult responsibilities (I’m still trying to get to the point in my life where I actually take my clothes out of the dryer as soon as there finished rather than the day after…. and yes, my clothes are typically wrinkly). But, it really is interesting to think that we are who we are from day 1. Now, I’m sure someone could argue against my statement by saying something along the lines of…..”well I definitely changed since high school” “or I’m not the same as I was in elementary school….”, which is all true but down to the core….you really haven’t changed. A sensitive child is going to be a sensitive adult, a child that has a real temper is going to be a hot tempered adult, and a child that eats their boogers (which is ALL OF THEM) will grow out of that habit when they realize they don’t really taste all that great. In the end, I wrote this mainly to affirm to myself that it’s OKAY to be a little different (if you haven’t already noticed, I’m pretty strange). In my opinion, it’s better to be different, life would be so boring if I wasn’t the sarcastic, witty, strong willed human being that I am. So, it’s good to know I was always destined to be who I am, not that I would change I think I’m pretty awesome person…but I may be a tad bit biased.

MEME

 

On a side note: I’m really thankful Facebook and other social media exists, that way I can still see what’s going on with my preschool babies after I quit working at the daycare. I really am going to be curious to know which of them will be ruling wall street, which will be saddling horses, and which will be running the world!

 

Catch you on the flipside!

Maya

Step To It!

Want to know one of my very favorite past times (even if you don’t I’m going to tell you anyway…😊). Well, I love nothing more than justifying my horrific diet/exercise habits with even more horrific excuses such as; my headphones aren’t sounding too clear….I obviously can’t go on a run today (because my legs just seem to stop functioning when my headphones aren’t working right), I can eat this whole order of French fries because potatoes are a vegetable (I’ll give myself a break on that, they are the tastiest “vegetable” around), or my very favorite… I worked with kids all day so I deserve to eat this whole bowl of ice cream and these Cheetos on the side (I can’t be the only one who needs salty treats with my sweets!). In the end, college and college weight gain (and general unhealthy habits) have hit me hard. Back when I was in middle school (damn, that makes me sound ancient), I could run a mile in less than seven minutes, these days I’d be lucky if I could run a mile in SEVENTY minutes (yes that is an extreme exaggeration, but the writing flowed so well I had to leave it). In my teens, I played sports and made a real effort to stay active and eat healthy, however as soon as I went to college and moved away from home I broke from my standard day-to-day routine. I quickly found much more comfort in eating a whole box of Teddy Grahams whilst watching reruns of The OC (the most UNDERRATED teen drama in my opinion, everyone should go watch if you haven’t. It’s on Hulu!) rather than spending hours at the gym. I also spent my Freshman year living in a dorm that offered soft serve ice cream at every meal (breakfast included) and served up healthy eats like pizza, burgers, pasta, hot fries on the hour (yes, they refilled the French fry bin EVERY HOUR they were open), oh and there was also a salad bar but I didn’t frequent that station too often (okay-I never frequented that station). So, my unhealthy habits culminated over the years and now I sit as a woman in her 20s who hasn’t done anything physically active beyond light walking in about three years, and whose also grown a very strong liking to Taco Bell recently (yes, the place with the horrendous “Mexican” food). All these factors combined take me to where I am today which is—really out of shape! Luckily, my latest vacation to Seattle has really inspired me to be more active (yes Maya, this means more than parking in the very back of the Chipotle parking lot for the extra steps). My sister and brother-in-law had me walking, hiking, and climbing (it was only climbing stairs in their townhome…but they’re steep!) almost every day during my two week stay. In the end, I left inspired to keep up the activity (it definitely didn’t hurt…I mean physically my limbs feel like noodles but at least they are becoming more defined noodles!) and make an effort to live a healthier lifestyle (my healthy lifestyle WILL include a Doritos Locos taco every once in a while though😉).

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As you can see from my positioning, I’m a pro at hiking snowy mountain tops…..:/

I also feel that I should clarify what my goals are behind this whole “living healthier” kick I’m on (I call it a “kick” because there is no guarantee it’ll last long at all….I hope it will but, this isn’t the first time in the last couple years I’ve “vowed” to live healthier and subsequently ended up visiting a place like Taco Bell weekly), I’m not really trying to lose huge amounts of weight (I won’t argue with a few pounds) nor am I trying to be the next fitness blogger/Instagram star/Inspirational public fitness figure either (my sarcasm and RBF would not help me become any of those). Ultimately, I want to feel good mentally and physically…..and as much as I love to sit in my bed all day watching Documentaries and snacking on Australian licorice (the strawberry kind of course), Lucky Charms, and Pizza (all washed down with a Coke), that lifestyle doesn’t always leave me feeling very chipper in the end—but it does in fact leave me with a funky stomach ache.

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Marathons…eating cupcakes….it’s all the same right!?

To really establish my commitment to the cause, I made a last-minute decision today (Monday, July 17th) to begin my journey into a healthy(ish) lifestyle. I went on my first run in years (by run I mean run/walk/walk/walk/light jog/walk some more/okay run the last block back to the house) and I felt great afterwards! I say I feel great now because it’s only been a few hours since I got back, so I may drastically change that statement when I can barely bend my knees in the morning. In the long run (haha…. RUN…only I found that punny….okay) the sore muscles will be worth it, my old soccer coach always said “if you ain’t sore you ain’t working hard”, and I can’t help but agree with him in this instance. I also really felt a need to begin my mission today because I ate a cupcake for breakfast and a cupcake for a pre-dinner dessert (one my co-workers brought them in and I had to pay her my respects by eating some). Conclusively, I’m writing this in order to hold myself accountable (a.k.a if I don’t look like Karlie Kloss by next year y’all better get onto me 😉) and having my new lifestyle plan written is one step in the right direction for myself…..I think.

 

Catch you on the flipside!

Maya

Next Stop

For the past several months my family, my friends, my mother’s coworkers, my doctors, and strangers alike have all presented me with a daunting question; what are your plans after college? The answer to that question should obviously be pretty simple, I’m majoring in Education so the short answer is I’m going to be a Teacher (assuming I get a…I’m pretty superstitious so I’m not going to finish that statement in fear of jinxing myself, but I’m sure you know where I was going with that 😉). While there is always a simple answer to the question for some reason, people always want to know more; “Where are you going to teach at? Where are you going to live? What grade do you think you’ll be teaching? Do you have a boyfriend (that’s my very favorite one….I obviously have to have a man to take care of me because I’m going to be a teacher *insert eye roll*).  I know it sounds like I hate when people ask me questions and find interest in my life (I definitely don’t or I certainly wouldn’t be publicizing my blog) the biggest problem I have with these questions is I don’t have answers for them myself. In my parent’s minds, I need to go back to Dallas after graduating where I’ll teach in one of the suburban districts in the area and maybe even live with them for a year or two (while not paying rent sounds awesome…I’m still not convinced by this plan). In my friend’s minds, I need to find a place that makes me happy (this place of course is not going to be practical for a young, slightly broke working individual like myself). In the minds of my doctors, mother’s coworkers, and strangers…. well I actually don’t really know about them luckily, they don’t offer up their own opinions about my life decisions as openly as my family and friends do. The only thing I know for certain is my life would be a whole lot simpler if I could just stay in college for a little while longer (except not take classes…so I basically want a year or two to chill, I don’t think that’s an unreasonable request).

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There’s always a “look” to accompany the question!

The most pressing issue that needs to be solved is where I’ll be living my post-grad life, once this question is answered all the other “who, what, when, where, and whys” will likely (emphasis on the likely) fall in place. While I would love nothing more than to pack up and live in an entirely different state than Texas, I know that isn’t a reasonable or practical decision to make at this point in my life. If I lived in a fantasy world, I’d be off to California the minute after I’m handed my diploma. I’ve always been really drawn to California (I really wanted to go to college there but, I respected my parent’s wishes and stayed stateside), I love the vibe, I hear the weather is great, the music scene there is awesome, and it all together seems like it’d be a fun place to experience my early 20s in. That is simply a fantasy for several reasons; California is the most expensive state to live in, I’d most likely have to retake a couple classes and become recertified to even get a job there, and I don’t have any family or friends anywhere near the State so that may be a bit of an adjustment. Because California and several other intriguing places are out of the question for the time being, I have set my sights on Austin. It’s kind of like the Los Angeles of Texas, it’s not quite as progressive….but I definitely think it’s an eclectic enough city for me (it also has the BEST food and is quite scenic which is harder to come by around here). As you can see, my mind is all over the place; I have these extreme expectations for my life after college and have convinced myself the only way to live out my youth (while I still have it) is in a hip city……when in reality once I become a working adult I’ll probably be begging to return back to my quaint (often times boring) life in College Station.

The funniest part about all of this is if you’d asked 18-year-old Maya where she wanted to go after College she’d have said this; “Back to Dallas of course! It’s a great place to raise a family!”. My priorities have definitely shifted a little….because at 18, I wanted to be married by 22/23 (I’m not opposed to this but the way my relationships are going at the moment, this likely won’t be happening), have a baby by 24 (THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN….working at a daycare has really shined some reality on this thought…..I think I’ll be ready for one by 30 but I’m willing wait a little longer as well😊), and a few years after that I’d be living in a typical suburban home with a working husband, a dog, and my 2.1 kids (I think that’s the average American number?). This life wouldn’t be bad I’m pretty familiar with it because I lived it ( I am ½ of the 2.1 kids), but me being the free-spirited, independent, and creative person I am realized ,as I got older, I needed more to my life. At the end of the day, I’m definitely not opposed to living a life like the one I described in my 30s (minus the suburban house, my taste is definitely more modern) right now I crave the city life. How amazing is it to be able to WALK to restaurants, have bars and entertainment right at your fingertips, and see homes that have their own originality. I understand there are many downsides to living in a city, but I feel that I definitely deserve a right to live through them anyway (In my 20 years I have only lived in suburban cities of Texas).

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While its an amazing city…I definitely won’t be living in New York!

I feel now is the perfect time to write about these concerns and think about these unknowns, because in exactly 12 months I should have the answers to all my family, friends, mother’s coworkers, doctors, and strangers’ questions. Whether it be my parent’s home in suburban Dallas, a rustic studio apartment in Austin, or a ROOM (I would only be able to afford a singular room) in a house in California, I know I’ll be starting my first year of true adulthood the way I should be (to me everything happens for a reason). Ultimately, I KNOW I’ll make it out to a city or a different state one day, the most pressing question for myself is, when will I make it happen?

Catch you on the flipside!

Maya